Young people adapt their Islamic faith to American society

8-18 Media traveled to Dearborn, Michigan in late July and teamed up with a second youth journalism bureau, Y-Press of Indianapolis, to interview Muslim youth on their experiences of being Muslim in America. This is the second of two articles on the trip. The first was published in last month’s Marquette Monthly.

We mostly hear about Islam as an extremist religion. We hear it being condemned, and being defended. But we rarely hear examples of individual interpretations of Islam as we do of Christianity in the United States. When 8-18 Media went to Dearborn, we found that the Muslim community there was quite diverse.

Like Christianity and most other faiths, Islam is an ancient religion. Today, Muslim teenagers face the same challenges and decisions as any other teenager, but since many of their families come from very traditional backgrounds they try to balance their heritage and faith with a modern world. Based on their upbringing, and on difficult personal decisions, Muslim youth in the United States have chosen a variety of different spiritual and cultural paths.

Most we talked with agreed Islam forbids drinking alcohol and eating pork. It also asks you not to date, instructs you to pray, (preferably in Arabic) five times a day, and asks women of marrying age to wear the hijaab or headscarf, which covers their hair. These expectations make fitting Islam into daily life in America difficult. For instance, recently there was a problem with swimming classes in Michigan schools. The requirement says all students must learn to swim but Muslim girls did not feel comfortable wearing a bathing suit, so they are now allowed to swim in different attire. Another controversy arising is whether or not schools should, or can, provide prayer rooms and time for Muslims to pray during school hours. That is still being worked out in many communities with a Muslim population.

On 8-18 Media’s recent trip to Dearborn we talked to many different Muslim youths with views ranging from very traditional to those that were more modern. We talked to Muslims who pray five times a day and Muslims who do not. We talked to those who questioned their faith and those who had no doubt that they were on the right path. We talked to both Sunni and Shi’a, both boys and girls. We talked to women who wear the Hijaab and women who don’t. But no matter what their views were, their faith had a daily impact on their lives.

Despite growing up in a Muslim family Reema Abusalah, 16, says her faith didn’t play a big role in her life until recently.

“My family isn’t very…we’re not very religious. So personally, my faith, I think it really started to build after my grandfather passed away a year and a half ago,” she said. “I think it gets stronger by the day, but it’s not very strong, and I’m hoping my faith will become a lot stronger.”

Abusalah has started to pray five times a day and she has also started to wear the hijaab, or headcover. Some believe that the hijaab is oppressive and that women are forced to wear it, but Abusalah doesn’t see it that way.

“I put mine on before my older sister did, so that’s just proof that my parents would never force me to put it on,” she said.

8-18 Media met with Abusalah during a session of an all girls Muslim sports program at the Islamic Center of Detroit. The program was started three years ago. Because it’s only for girls, it gives participants a chance to play sports without wearing the hijaab.

Noor Salem, 14, is another member of the sports program. We asked Salem what she thinks about Muslims who don’t follow the Qur’an and Islam as closely as she does.

“Many people here just don’t want to know their religion. They just, well, they want to have temptations and [stay] ignorant,” she said.

Abusalah agrees, “Many people, even though they are Muslim, they don’t act like they are. A lot of people, they’re [just Muslims] by name,” she said. “A lot of people don’t follow their religion, but it all depends, I guess, on the family or how you want to get started in your faith.”

For Yusef Saad, 16, the choice to follow Islam is his. He comes from a Muslim family and as he’s gotten older he has chosen to have his faith play a bigger role in his life.

“Religion has played a big role in my life because I don’t drink, smoke, cheat, lie, all that stuff, just because I want to be a good person. My parents don’t force that upon me,” Saad Said. “I didn’t start praying until the beginning of this year. My parents never really said, ‘Yusef, it’s time to go pray.’ When I grew up I thought it was time to learn how to pray and now I pray five times a day. I go to the mosque whenever I can, when I’m not working,” he said. “My sisters don’t wear the headscarf because they don’t want to, or they don’t feel like it. They say as they get older they might. It’s really up to them. Saad added, “Our family is really close. I will never raise my voice to my parents because first of all it’s against our religion. We’re close because of religion and also because we’re a family.”

Ashraf Aboukhodr, 17, also comes from a Muslim family, though he has attended Catholic school for most of his life. As with Saad, his parents allow him to choose how he practices Islam.

“My parents bring it out there and if I want to choose it then I will, but they won’t make me,” Aboukhodr said. “I personally choose to practice my religion. I don’t drink but I date. I don’t see a problem with dating. I used to go to the mosque with Yusef and I used to pray. But I used to pray in English and I don’t know how good that was. I’m not an extremist, but I’m not completely ignorant of my religion. I just want to be a good person. My religion has influenced me a significant amount, like at least 70 percent. Before I started dating I [asked myself] if this is right, if I should do this. But I’m not going to go out and have sex or drink or do drugs because of my religion but because of morals, too, and morals and religion are intertwined,” He added.

Hussein Itawi, 19, grew up in a Muslim family and he now attends Wayne State University and is planning to major in fashion merchandising and graphic design. He is also very interested in the performing arts. With five sisters, Itawi comes from a big family. His dad is Lebanese and his mom is Native American. His dad is Muslim and his mom was a Baptist but converted to Islam about 15 years ago. Itawi says his faith and what is written in the Qur’an influence his life, but in the end it’s his choices that count.

“It is very old school. And it doesn’t deal with the things that happen today in these times,” Itawi said, “You can’t really change the Qur’an in any way, so I think as a person I interpret my religion the way I want to and other people interpret it the way they want to.” He added, “Some things are written in black and white, like you can’t murder or steal. But there are the smaller things that there’s leeway with because times have changed. There things that The Qur’an doesn’t [address] so interpretation comes in a lot.”

His faith plays a role in his life, but his family is not as religious as many are, though they do fast and acknowledge religious holidays and mourning times. For the most part he faces the same difficulties and temptations as any other American teen. He believes it’s your decision to make as an individual.

“I do party. I won’t do drugs. It’s not a part of who I am. But I think I go through it as any other American teenager goes through it. We’re all tempted by it. But it’s a personal choice of whether you’re actually going to do it or not,” Itawi said. “I honestly think being Arab or Muslim doesn’t really have a lot to do with it because with religion it’s a flat out no, but in the end it’s a personal choice,” he added.

Dating is strongly discouraged, or even forbidden in Islam, but like many other American teens Itawi does date. Though the way he looks at it is perhaps a bit different than the way many teens do.

“I see no problem with dating as long as I’m serious about it and I’m not just going to have a fling. If I feel like I could spend the rest of my life with this person, then, yeah, but that’s a part of dating, You kind of figure out if it‘s yes or no. But I won’t get into anything that I don’t feel is going to last because I don’t like the fling thing. It’s serious relationships that are going to better me,” he said.

Zeinab Sleiman, 18, attended Fordson High School in Dearborn and is now attending Wayne State University and majoring in pre-med. Her views tend to be more traditional though her opinion on dating is similar to Itawi’s.

“My parents raised me that if a guy wants to go out with me he has to come and talk to my parents about it first. And if my parents say I can then we’re allowed to,” she said. “I don’t know how it is in other religions, but hand-holding is later on when you get engaged.”

Sleiman has relatives who were raised quite differently.

“I have cousins that had an arranged marriage, and I don’t think it had to do with the religion, just the culture and how their parents are. My parents have never forced me into an arranged marriage. They said when I find the person I want to marry, that’s fine. I guess for some people it does work, but if you’re going to get pressured into it then I think it would be wrong,” she said.

When 8-18 Media asked Abusalah, Salem, and two of the other girls in the sports program if they were interested in dating, all of them shook their heads no.

There are those that would say people like Aboukhodr, Itawi and Sleiman aren’t true Muslims, but Itawi doesn’t believe that…

“I view myself as a true Muslim regardless. If I don’t pray five times a day I just see myself as not a practicing Muslim, but I am true Muslim. If you ask me what’s my religion the first thing that comes into my head is Islam,” Itawi said. ”There are people who say that if you don’t wear a headscarf and you don’t pray five times a day you’re not a true Muslim. I feel like they’re putting themselves in a little bit of a segregation bubble or putting themselves up on a little pedestal compared to other Muslims,” He added.

During the visit to Dearborn 8-18 Media also talked with Imam Muhammad Ali Elahi, the spiritual leader at the Islamic House of Wisdom. Imam Elahi was asked what he feels makes someone a true Muslim.

“Somebody asked Prophet Muhammad himself that what does Muslim mean, and he said to obey God and to love people,” according to Elahi. He added, “If someone is obedient to God and compassionate to people, then he is a real Muslim.”